Thursday, 18 February 2016

Quarterlife crisis? Only if you think it is. Relationships and Money paradox

I'm at the stage in my life where most of my peers are actively job hunting or have already landed a job.
You know?  The good ol' life formula that most people seem to follow.
1)  Get a degree
2)  Go job hunting
3)  Get said job
4)  Marry someone
5)  Have kids?
6) Buy a House
7) Retire?

That formula seemed to have worked last for the previous generations but not so much for this generation.  At the very least, the previous generations could justify going through the oppressive schooling system and at least no saddle themselves up in debt but not so much today.

In my case, I have one semester remaining and just enjoying every single moment that I have left as a student.  In terms of relationships, I have found myself in a long distance relationship that won't be shortened any time soon.  You would think that I would be dreading this (which I am to an extent) but I am also treating it as the PAIN process which is something everyone needs in order to progress.  I recognize that I am in no shape to try to court the local girls.  After-all, there is a recent article published by VancityBuzz describing how my provinces' top universities are producing more and more "sugar daddies".  Economically speaking, this makes a lot of sense for many young couples.  It is not very realistic for an undergraduate to be dating a man who is not financially stable yet.  However, I don't think this is the proper way at approaching relationships.

Here's why.  A lot of my friends are still single and their rationale behind that is that they cannot provide for their girlfriends since the idea of financial stability is almost too fleeting in the city of Vancouver.  I think that is just an excuse for many people.  They base their confidence on external factors whether it's money, looks, status, etc so what will happen when these factors fail them?  That hill that most of us perceive in what seems to be impossible to climb, overwhelms us.  I was at this stage once before my first relationship.  I thought I had to be financially stable first in order for a girl to even look at me but I was fortunate to meet my girlfriend who is 100% compatible with me.  Our future is still uncertain but I think the PAIN period is worth overcoming for this relationship to last.  For now, the only thing I can do is make as many mistakes as possible so I can learn from them and build a core confidence that is unbreakable.  

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